English isn't my first language / I am a native English speaker but a shy person...

1.5. How can I enforce my No if the harasser isn't giving up?

Because we are in a international context, there is unfortunately no other best option than SPEAK, express the best you can, give yourself the right to clearly say NO, expecting it will be respected

We are fully aware that being shy or not comfortable with speaking in english might put you in difficulties whatever the intensity of your willingness to say No and hope it will be respected.

But saying No is a difficult challenge!!

We are here to help !!!

Here are a bunch of ways to say No to loved ones, strangers, people selling you things, coworkers, lovers and everyone in between. Practice them all, and find the versions that work best for you. (Credit : Asking what you want https://www.askingforwhatyouwant.com/articles )

- No, Thank You

- Not Tonight / not Today

- I don’t have the internal resources to pull that off.

- Hmmm... that's not going to work !

- I am not so in that but you go have fun !

- I want to be in connection with you, but that doesn't work for me, Can we do this instead?

- I am No to that but yes to you

- I’m not available for anything like that right now.

- It’s really hard for me to say no to people, but I’m practicing being braver and more honest, so I’m going to say no right now

- I'm a No for now

- I need to build more trust before I'd be willing to consider that.

Remember:

- You don’t have to justify your no. Resist the temptation to explain why it’s not a good fit, why you feel stomach-churny, or why you need to build more trust. Avoid making excuses.

- When you state what’s true about your experience, it’s harder to argue with you.

- You get to have boundaries.

- “No” is a complete sentence.

- When you say what you do want instead, it gives you both something to work from (if you want that.)

Everybody, comfortable with non violent communication and erotic wording in english is invited here to contribute to link a lexic or add a link to a lexic if you know about some relevant one. The perfect format would be a lexic with each picture of a practice and open suggestions of how one can you say no to this practice, a playful, joyful and strong enough way

12 ways to say no gracefully https://www.askingforwhatyouwant.com/12-ways-to-say-no-gracefully-without-saying-maybe-later/

How to give feedback during sextime ? https://www.askingforwhatyouwant.com/how-to-give-feedback-during-sexytimes/

Next is...

Yes ! I can change my mind and it ought to be respected

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